What makes for a southern belle?

I'm from deep GA and can anyone tell me the traditional traits/mannerisms of a "Southern Bell". if that's what they call women from the south then what are northern women called? I'm not trying to be uppidy or saying southerners are better, I'm honestly just curious.|||Northern women are called ladies.|||I have read a good many diaries of women who lived during the Civil War period, and I really think the idea of the historical Southern Belle is predominately a stereotyped, romanticized image.





Let me first talk about the historical context:





A "belle" was a beautiful woman...that's that. North or South, people might say that someone was "the belle of the ball." Today, the social equivalent of a "belle" might be the most popular girl in High School.





In the 19th century, women North and South aspired to be "ladies," a term which had different connotations in different areas. In some areas, a "lady" was an upper-class woman who did no menial work (there were servants for that.) You may have heard the expression, "You can always tell a lady by her hands." (Because she did not work, her hands were very soft.) In other areas a good housewife might qualify as a "lady" if she were also suitably refined, pious, moral, feminine, etc. In the 19th century novel Stepping Heavenward, the heroine's cook is upset because she thinks her mistress is insinuating that she (the cook!) is not a "lady."





Southern middle and upper-class women, because of the presence of slaves, were assumed and even pressured to look as though they lived lives of complete leisure. Having a wife that did not "work" was a sign of upper-class status, which reflected favorably on the husband or father of the family. Having a "leisured" wife and daughters was a form of conspicuous consumption.





Now most Southern wives knew very well that this was all a myth. Most married women had to work and they worked very hard, although most tried to make their work look easy. Even mistresses of large plantations might have to cut out or sew clothing for the slaves, help with butchering and packing of meat, end the sick, keep accounts, etc.





Young Southern women, however, were often exempt from the daily toil. The time between a girl's social "coming out" and her marriage (which might only be a year or two) was a wonderful time in a girl's life, free of most responsibility, time for balls, parties and horseback rides. The wealthiest girls had personal maids to do everything for them; some girls did not even have to brush their own hair. Thus the image of the Southern Belle was born: rich, carefree, lady-like but vivacious, beautifully dressed, etc.





Of course all this came crashing down after the Civil War and reality set in with a vengeance. Those days became draped with nostalgia (like some people today might be nostalgic for high school), and were romanticized by the next generations who saw the lifestyle that their ancestors had lost.





The Modern Belle


When Gone with the Wind came out (as a movie) it further added to this myth with the character of Scarlett O'Hara. Unlike the book, which describes the behind-the-scenes work that the "sleek-haired wives" did from morning to night, the movie is mostly fixated on Scarlett and her teenaged lifestyle of flirtation, hoopskirts, barbecues and dances. In the book, it is Scarlett's mother, Ellen, and her sister-in-law Melanie who are the "great ladies" in the old, smillingly-stoic Southern tradition. They are the steel magnolias, with strength hidden behind a facade of femininity. Scarlett remains more like a spoiled child.





Today, I think people have different images of a "Southern Belle." Sadly, at times this phrase has deteriorated to mean any good-looking "good ol' girl" (i.e. Daisy Duke) who happens to have a Southern accent. In other cases, it can mean a flirtatious, pretty, wealthy Southern girl a la Scarlett O'Hara. At its best, it means a feminine, lady-like, soft-spoken, refined young woman who dresses in a feminine manner.





I hope this helps you. I'm a Southerner (some of my people had a small plantation in Twiggs Co, Ga., ) and a historian studying domestic life and women's 19th century clothing.|||I don't know what northern girls are called and I'm from the north..haha :]


but southern belles are usually displayed as nice, they know how to cook, are respectful, are beautiful, and have a southern accent.|||It's more than just attitude and accent that makes a Southern Belle.